Teacher: “Perhaps she would prefer something - ” My mom’s response: “Yeah, I don’t know why she likes those books, either.” The end!Īnyway, my teacher called to express her concern about my choice of reading material.

And just when you think she might get away with it, you find out the boy set up his camera one last time, catching both his murder and murderess on film. When he digs deeper, he discovers an underground coke (the drug, not the pop) ring in his high school before the head cheerleader, his mega-crush and one of the leaders of the ring, ties him to his bed, puts duct tape over his mouth, holds a fistful of cocaine under his nose, and forces him to overdose. Keep in mind, I was raised on comedy movies of the ’70s and ’80s, where the “boys will be boys” maxim often ruled.) Instead, he catches part of a murder. (That’s creepier to me now than it was at the time. If you haven’t read it, it’s about a boy who sets up a hidden camera in the girls’ locker room in the hopes of photographing showering students. That night, my teacher called my mom to discuss the novel I’d chosen for my book report - Die Softly by Christopher Pike. There will be some twenty-year-old spoilers past this point, so hardcore purists beware!

The above is an image from the film Mikey (1992).

When it finally came, I drew an arm from the elbow down, the hand clutching a baseball bat, and below that, the head and shoulders of a blonde cheerleader, her eyes closed, a trickle of blood streaming from her head and swirling with water as it runs down a shower drain. I remember sitting at my desk, pencil poised over the narrow strip of white paper while I waited for inspiration. In fourth grade, my teacher asked us to write a book report and to attach a bookmark featuring a scene from the book. If I close my eyes, I can still picture it.

Give me a kiss christopher pike